POS

It means Piece of shit. so is the instrument i'm working on a piece of shit? ZzZz... acutally not. But just the workload is HORRIBLE. Before you can even complete this few next few came along.

My legs are aching. Been thinking how will my life be like if i wasn't in poly. Who can actually predict.

Today's not such a good day actually. A bit moody though i slept early last night. And i was kind of being sabotaged. As i'm always not around the lab but in another lab, they (refers to the 2 other IA students) did not inform me that i have got samples. Which i was kind of suspecious, but decided to identify those thoughts as thinking too much. However, today when i receive a new job myself, i ask my acting sup if it needs to be up, she was like thought u have got more samples than that? and the thing is they did not log into the log book for me to check! like WTF! so tomorrow is a busy day!

O well How deep can you go i wonder? =P I'm still wondering what are you thinking about.

I've got limited $$ and i got lots of things to get! HOW?!?! Too little time, too many task. SHIT! No time and i'm here typing! dotz~~!!!

Love A

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Report!!!

Ar~~! FREAK! I've got to do report again. And this time it is rushing in another few days time i need to hand up! Guess what... I'm only 10% done?!?! WTH man. SHIT!

To think that i have got some time but in actual fact not at all. OMG. This is totally very very bad now. I'm in need of more brains to think faster and faster. A race against time!

My legs are aching! Hope it does not cause me much inconvinence tomorrow.

All i ever need... is you beside me radiating warmth.

Labels: Bored

The Purity of Music

Dinner

Dinner freaking late i think i'll die tml.

Anyway, i think someone don't read my blog at all. Haiz... Sad! =( A jantex cost S$540 at least. O sianz~!

All i can say is i miss. That's the most i can say...

Just hoping for some great one to take me along.

Sometimes i just couldn't understand people. Ya.

I'm so bored doing the report. Hopefully i can finish it by this Thursday.

I'm so tired now. Just don't let me think anymore. I just want to think about it as the way i'm thinking about it. Nvm if you don't understand. Eventually you will just read the sentence above again bah.

Fail to comment on anything.

Labels: Tired

The Purity of Music

I'm Stuck

I'm very stuck. At such a time where i felt that i don't have the ability to move forward anymore. Forward as in progress in life. Everything is back to square one. Square again. And square somemore. I'm living a life like last time's last time's last time? Weird eh? Nvm.

All i know is that i have very little people whom i can depend on. Or rather who treat me as their friend. Though i maybe very easy to make quick friends with, i reserve the best friends cat. to ppl who are able to fulfill those "regulations" =P. Only few made it till now i guess. They know themselves. Argh. forget about these things first. Cause that made me very guilty. Haven't met up with my Sec sch and JC Friends for a long long, God knows how long, time.

Ok. Back to reality. I'm yet again doing some stupid things which i seriously don't know why i'm doing so. Maybe i'm just falling into the suppose forgotten well again. If it is so and you are not going to catch me at the end of the well. Do inform me. I'll find my own way out. But for now i'm still free falling down the well.

I was thinking of asking people out but again i'm thinking of not asking them out. Cause i'm in a mood where entertaining is not my forte now. I'm so tired actually. Tired of my own world thet i hope it just come to a stand still for me to react to sort out and to keep on track of my suppose "progresses" in life. Now that my future is uncertain. I think this was the main reason i'm going back to square square square one. But some advancements are made to keep myself on track, though they seems in vain.

O side track a bit i just saw this on my friend's msn nick: "When you love that person, are you loving his/her looks or just him/her?" My answer would be both.

I'm tired already. Can i rest totally. Just alow me to do things i like? Let me take a super long leave. A leave from this world in my own dreams for as long as i like.

Labels: Troubled

The Purity of Music

Tired!

This is the first time in my life that i felt so tired the whole day. And i was practically using 10% of the 10% of brains i'm normally using. Practically felt like sleeping.

Anyway, been thinking of something lately. Thinking about it alot! But sadly i still can't get an answer to the question. All i need is to ask but it is such a difficult thing to do. I just hope, pray, and think that you are alright these days.

People are still laughing at me over the last night's incident where i fell and slided 3m at the interchange! OMG! I'm so sad. What's more i think i'm so freaking stupid to send a message to someone. I don't know it it'll affect the already complicated and confuse mind. Oppps. I really hope i'm not labelled FAN right.

Lots of crap and funny stuff happened today, but however i'm only contributing to less than 25 % of the good stuff. One guy went off, the others were kind of sad too. (not my dpt btw)

I'm really tired. but i don't get to do a few things i want to do. =(

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

O NO!!!

Shit totally. I fell at the interchange just now!!! OMG.. And drift for 3m. argh!

Pissed by that msg receive just now about some calling people to ask if the budget is approved.

Happy cause i went for practice and suppose quite happy with my performance. Then went to eat my "dinner". Had lots of laughters after so long. lolx

Ok. To that someone: I don't think you read my blog right??

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

YEAH!! NO MORE BULLIES!

O well, i heard news about my supervisor's "home-coming". Next thursday! WoOt!!!~~~ freaking happy, yet freaking scared! Lolx. Stupid ain't it? Ya i think i'll be scolded also. Gearing up for it! :X At least there is a dateline to that BULLY! Seems everyone in the lab cannot take it.

Next issue, some ppl msg me barking me for things which is not do-able at such a time, so let's just forget about them. Blogging about them once is enough!

Just now went for a movie, the food is quite like a HORRIBLE! no choice dinner, jumbo hotdog, and chicken baked rice! with the movie Harry Potter. half the time i was eating the other half drinking throughout the show. Luckily i did not choke! Ar, it's gonna cost a bomb when we start counting tmomrrow. =S

!!!State of confusion!!!

Sometimes i think back in the past maybe 1 year plus till now. The events that happened, the things that i said, the actions and everything. I got so sad, blur, happy, confused, excited. Everything puts together in a complicated puzzle that is placed there untouched (decided not to touch). As i don't know how to start, where to start. Maybe only to you that i don;t really known how i should react like how it should be reacted. I'm afraid, afraid that i might hit on the wrong thing. But time is running short. Really short, after IA which is a few weeks more, some training, back in school for a short but tedious sem, and everyone's at their separate ways. I cannot believe how fast it is, how am i going to live after this course of study. (Let's exclude the CCA part!) How will things be for me? and everyone else that includes you. What are your furute plans? Just thinking of this i'm so troubled.

What if I start a conversation with you? Will you sustain this conversation?? Haiz, ok i know i'm thinking too much. And i really hope you are doing well now. Really doing well. =(

Next up, i think i'm too drama already. so drama till i'm acting like a.. Nvm. All my phrases are so commonly used now. O no.

Ok last of all. To you: Miss ya somehow. But if it does affect you tell me ok? (if you even read this that is.)

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Emo

I'm feeling so freaking weird now! It is like you are at a lost. And you just hope that everything in the world just stop to let you sort out everything. Put everything back in place. Hate it so much when there is some stupid CCA that binds you to it. Even on attachment!

Freaking angry just now. Let me bitch a bit. So sorry. First, I ended my work at 8pm so i called the VP as she answers her phone and found out that she did not go so i called the P no answer as usual. By the time i'm reaching home, she called and bark me for some stupid things. Like is the budget approved? Like what should i say? it is in the out tray that you need to check. I'm not in school and cannot be in school. so why can't someone help? And you are the president so freaking do your job besides telling us what needs to be done ensure that it is do, you also need to help! :@ Totally irritated! Then ask $$ from members by when? 31th July. And you told the members already? Freaking hell NO! What you want me to do? can't you do something? I've already affected my grade because of this CCA! And i'll never tolerate anymore such nonsense! You don't even care about my grades? So why should i put in so much effort in building your stupid cca?

Anyway i'm in a very complicated cross road now! i'm so tired of everything i just hope this CCA thing end for once and for all! besides the CCA thing i have got a lot other things to worry. But people don't know at all. To say it is not shown on my face. That's something I just found out recently. To that someone, I'll be grateful if you can be a bit more direct. (-.-) Don't even know if you are reading this. O well... Tml's work. Yawnz~~ I think i'm missing someone already! ZzZz... (HELP!!!)

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Fat Parrot!

I don't know how that name was given to me! Ok.. But on second thought, i think first reason. I'm FAT!. And the 2nd reason, I was just repeating what she said! Thus, she gave this stupid ku-ku name to me! ARGH! Ok i think i'mgetting more irritating! O no! How??

On the other side of the specturm, i'm feeling very stress these days. It's not really about now. But more like about my future. First, immediate problem is that stupid CCA. Don't understand what is attachment, and expect so much? i can just withdraw! I don't even know why this post is given to me. Maybe cause of my background? Who actually knows. Ok it is also a bit of the political stuff which they only think i need to be committed to their CCA. When i stated very very clearly, i've got 2 CCAS!

Second, My studies. It is so much so a concern thati think i'll just want to throw everything aside. No point in working so hard for CCAS. They just take you for granted! That's what i've learnt so far. Just do what you want. You've got to learn to be selfish sometimes and especially it is about your future. I need to set lots of time aside to study already.

Third, where should i head into? continue chemical or go business or do something else like physics or music?? argh! trouble lies ahead! HELP! But i know one thing. Through real hard success will come in time.

O well. Next very personal issue is why is everyone thinking i'm such a bitch! (-.-) Reflection time~~

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

F.T.R

It actually means Fuck The Rain! Cool huh. (-.-||) It started since Tuesday night. And this morning, the rain is really OMG! So well it helps to put this nick into use.

Well to say i'm quite piss with my sister. She's complaining that i have got no contributions the past 1 month. If you look at it, I've been working really long hours these days. So is it my fault? Don't care. There is practically nothing much that i can do. Irritating!

Anyway, ended work at 10.30pm! And i got to go back to work at 8.30am? so = 10 hours plus at least 7 hours of sleep? Cause i cannot sleep less than that. NOT LIKE SOMEONE! the next 3 hours how? 1 for bathing and my checking e-mail and all other stuff before i sleep, 1 for morning preparations, the other one? travel to work! So am i left with a lot of time? So don't complain when i have got a bit more time i need to start on my report? i'm not like you alright "superwoman"

Ok, funny things happens and there are 3 peaks in my mood a day. That's what i've found out today! Cool!

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Hate It

As a more "senior" IA student, you are not given the respect. So irritating! Ok respect by the 2 freaking idiotic IA students. Cannot get things done fast, don't have good time management, What's worse Bad planning and most importantly.. THEY TALK FREAKING LOT!!!! And they are talking about like fighting, cars, past "HEROIC" experiences like dotz OK! The worse one, who you gave your first time to. (Btw, they are guys.) I was like WTF! 2nd day of your attachment you call me gayboy! FUCK YOU! Teach you the test. You are not even listening and volumetric flask got that line to fill up to right, you can fill over the line and everything overflow??? WTH! That cause me to waste my 2 hours of effort! Damn irritated. There are lots more!! I think i can start writing a book already.

Now, I don't even care already. I'm like stuck at a position of being a nice guy or a bad guy. You have already cross my limit! So my tone is just like that. All i can say is TOO BAD!!! =P You can ask supervisor you don't want and come ask me? Then argue with me? so why not just redo it in the first place? FUCKING IRRITATING! I need to attend to other things UNLIKE YOU! sit there weigh and talk whole day! Then things cannot finish the company have to pay you OT for things that could have already been done without OT!

The place is so freaking messy. When i was doing everything alone for 3 weeks plus i think. or even 4. Everything is neat and tidy in order and not so wet and messy. NOW??? ARGH.

Ok sorry for the fuck here and fuck there. I really cannot stand it anymore! Go one round to shoot me? You watch it!!

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Depression

I think i'm falling into depression. What's actually happening is something i cannot comprehen myself. Don't bother asking me. All i know is that i'm feeling down, reason being, refer to above.

I'm just thinking what is it that i'm lacking that is causing this "depression" kind of thing. Love, Family, Self-confidence, Knowledge, Behavior or in general Everything?

Today's day out i think i bored my friend. So sorry. =( But i've been in such a mood for quite a long while already. this is getting from bad to worse! It is not jus down but practically falling into depression. Trying to make yourself happy, and thus the people around you happy. I'm just thinking if i were to be gone~ What whould be happening?

Argh! never mind. Thinking too much. Tomorrow is a "brand new" day! Like real. Facing those people is a terror. Not that i wasn't like so in-performable before. But seriously they are getting on my nerves. Already a freaking month. They had better not piss me off tomorrow!

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Sat

After a week of running around, i'm tired. And friday, i failed everything. How sad. first got scolded for not able to complete what I'm suppose to do. Reason because of some idiot! Then, many reports that were supposed to be done by me. I did not manage to do them. So in the end i caused delay for my own work and the admin work. The ICP's results were keyed in but got to re-key cause the diskette got problem!

Friday's a bad day! but Thursday was good. went to Marina Square for dinner at subway! took a cab there. And so happen all's on me! =D opps. sian. let's not talk about $$ ok. i'm now super broke.

But anyway, the 2 IA students are getting on my nerves! I cannot stand it anymore! I seriously don't know what they are doing. It just totally piss me off la. When you cannot produce results. And your performance is so bad that includes YOUR TIME MANAGEMENT! and the company need to pay you overtime for things you can do within the working hours? like WTF! Not that i want to brag or anything, i can finish all 3 test within 8.30 to 6pm! What about you? only doing one test and you guys are so freaking slow! It is totally what the hell! Argh, i'm now so HOT! not HOT that hot but is angry! my top's blowing already to think that Monday i've got to see them again.

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Jasper Not!

This is so not Jasper of feeling so tired sleeping on every journey from one place to another. Showing that he is tired out in public so much so that everyone knows that there is something really wrong.

O well. First, morning woke up quite ok. But just i haven got people to go out with me. Guess everyone had their own programme. Second, got a lecture about some money issue (expected of a treasurer.) The 2nd already spoil my day. the 3rd is worse. Already feeling so irritated abt the 2nd, some idiots just continue to spoil my day.

But today's the first time Jasper ate 2 servings of Ice cream within 3 hours? He needs more exercise now! Somethings is better to keep to myself so yupz~! *ZIP*

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Rest

Monday's another battle! But guess it's suppose to be a bit better. Hopefully. *Fingers Cross*

I'm going for my lab to the admin office to the ICP-OES. Which is like walking and walking and walking. Plus i need to go toliet leh? so 4 places to run?

My lab i have got only 1 test to do. Cause the other 2 gave to the 2 IA students each. Mine's quite fast bah. Just the waiting time of 2 hours. Then i need to be admin boy that takes reports from the lab to the admin office. Signing checking etc. (that's not my part la. I'm only "running". Haiz) Then at the admin office, sometimes i need to help scan the report into PDF file save it in the repective folders and send it to customers?

Next comes the ICP-OES, I'm there to learn the ICP-OES seems simple yet not very simple hope i can remember the steps. But still need to have more practice!!! And i can write it in my report! O.o Cool eh! I helped to pack the super duper messy rack! now it is clean and organised! lolx. Hopefully it stays this way. That's the few things i do these days.

Saw my supervisor yesterday! yeah like at last. She hinted about her return. like 2 weeks from now! Cool! But u noe what. She also know that i'm being bullied! =S O man! and she is half laughing when i asked her about her return. O man. Felt so useless. =( But when she return... I'll also be scolded terribly. i'm off on hte 10th Aug. and presentation is like 27th aug. i'm in need of a rush! (Time to start buying presents! =X There goes my $$$)

Alright, now it's sat and i'm so happy with my sleep! like at last its sleep. However, now i don't know who to ask out! i'm like so sian! ARGH!

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Admin

One whole day of admin work~~~ O man! You wouldn't want to known what i've been doing the whole day. Running here and there. Asking people if they need help. Now even some calculations and keying in of results for cleanroom stuff i also know. ICP-OES result table and keying the results i also get to know. scanning faxing even copying also know. like wow!

Now in company, i'm like an IA student with the responsibility of a full timer? haiz. yeah! tml my sup coming back!!! but only for a while.. =( She's so so so needed now! To look at the 2 IA student. They are beyond my control!!!

Work's cool, till you see that u need to go back to school for presentation. that's on the 20++ monday. afternoon slot. argh! my holiday shortened! Final report also have to start soon~~ I'll miss everyone there. haha! the er xin lorS the aunties and uncles and most importantly my dept!

time to sleep~~ lolx.. work tml!

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Thinking of

hmmm... Thinking of getting myself a ring and necklace which i've been saying since eons ago! It's shopping time!

O well, part of the reason to shop around is. Cause of stress. =S Today, i'm like quite slack but when samples came i'm like got my stuff done! =D and out of 3 test i normally do, now i'm only doing 1. As there is the other 2 IA students to help. However, having another 2 person to help is not allowing the progress to be as fast as one person doing! So FREAKING SLOW LA! ok no bitching policy!

sometimes i felt tt i'm an IA student who's working like a full timer. Opps! Having another 2 IA students "under" me, help do some cover work. O and don't tell others, i've been chit chatting a lot recently. Reason 1: No Samples. Reason 2: Work covered. Reason 3: Leaving soon? lolx. Not this case actually, just hlp out as much as i can and make more friends? Now, like almost every lab have got people who knows me? which is a good thing. Easier to get things done i guess. lolx!

Time to sleep already i guess. Gotta wake up early! Yawnz~ and go to work tomorrow to entertain some people?? =S i rather be off doing something else. =X like chit chat help admin stuf then to stay there entertaining my 2 IA student. =S

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Unknowningly

I spent 100 plus. Like how? well through a phone and there goes my 100... like dotz... now seriously no $$$ already.

anyway lots of shuffling in my dept's IA students. reason i don't really know. O well, i'm like now in-charge-of 2 IA students and they are giving me a headache! OMG!

Went to Aunt's place for dinner. Cause i ended work late and by the time i reach school everyone already went off. So asked for permission to not go. Andit is granted. Sister was home since evening, and went to aunt's place to give something and also chit chat a bit. but i'm quite tired already. so yupz.

Well, i dread tomorrow i guess. so like ARGH! irritated? Felt so bad. Like i'm always bitching about the 2 students. =S This is so not me...

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music

Concert

OMG. Please don't say i screw it up. Cause indeed i did screw it up. It hmmm... jus show one thing though. Don't anyhow message!

There were a few first times. Like first time sending messages in between pieces. Opps! Taking a big water bottle that suppose looks like the toliet bowl cleaning agent up the stage and put beside me! (in the end i drank only a bit, cause it is like everyone asking for water) O well, maybe it is like a good luck charm and u spread it to everyone how stupid! lolx! lame. sudden;y decided not to play for a certain piece. Ok more like play some parts only. :S The worse was like u screwed ur part and being recon for it! OMG! shit!

Next, is it really necessary to meet up every week? For some gay meeting? argh! each time is 3 hrs and it is like talking about crap stuff. Agenda is like 2 things: Attendance and Scores! like totally. nvm. A bit of irritated you see. Anyway, don't know why need to met every week. Plus not a lot of things to talk about also and like somethings jus post reminder can already. and the worse thing is the super gay attendance marking system! OK... i think i write too much here...

Up in line, my programme line up is super long. 9 mths from now. 3 concerts! argh!!! Help! =( I'm so stress now. Thinking about it together with my studies and my little bit of not much extra time to interact with friends. And my family how? haiz! i think i need a long holiday! to relax myself.

Now, I'm sad dun ask y... How to start my monday! =(

Labels: Rant

The Purity of Music